The fam and I went to Bern on Monday (post to come this week). Bern is my favorite city in Switzerland. I can't really put my finger on way, I just love the atmosphere, the bears, and the main street. It just has a great feel to it for me.
As we were leaving, I realized: I will never come back to Bern.
And holy hell, did that realization set off some feelings.
We aren't even that far away from the move, actually. I mean, yes, two and a half months will be here before we know it. We know people who are leaving before that so we haven't felt the pressure of the move yet.
But when I realized the finality of it, the fact that I will probably never see Bern again... that really just put it into perspective. And I think this feeling is why leaving here will be so much harder than it was leaving Baltimore to move here.
When we left Baltimore, we knew this move would be temporary. We knew that we would see our loved ones again and live near them again. Yes, the separation would be hard. But we would be back eventually.
This move... well, who knows if we will ever get back to Switzerland. And, if we ever do, it will surely be different. Our friends, expats themselves, will no doubt move on or back to their homes in time. The plus side is that we will have friends scattered all over the world to go see. The downside of that is that we will friends scattered all over the world.
These last two months are just that. Our last two months- in Switzerland, living in a postcard, with our friends.
Brian said it best; this whole situation is bittersweet. We are heartbroken to be leaving this life we have created here but excited to have a home and grow our lives back in Baltimore. It will be one of the hardest things we ever do.
So we've decided to spend what free time we have enjoying our time here instead of squeezing a ton of trips in. That's not to say we won't be traveling, we will. But we hope to enjoy this awesome quality of life Switzerland has to offer (if the sun ever comes out again) before we move back.
Bring it on.
3 comments:
I could feel the tears on your keyboard as you wrote this post. It is bittersweet to leave a place that you've come to love, in order to return home. But where is home now? So very sad for you. Love to all.
Aw, I loved Hoppy's comment.
You know, you just might have an excuse soon to go to Bern. Like, you know, if you're sitting around bored on, say June 14, wondering what in the world you could possibly do. Or maybe not. I'm sure something just as interesting and closer to home might pop up. :-)
I know "seeing Bern for the last time" is just one example. What a mixed bag of feelings to heave to deal with.
Beautifully stated Meghan.
How wonderful for you and Brian
to realize it now...so you have
time to "be in every moment"
Enjoy every moment of your
wonderful life in CH, the
region, and all your great
friends :)
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